Nov 2017 Update: Trying [and Failing] to Dodge Bullets

Hello, dear readers!

Real life remains a priority for me, even though some mild depression has dampened my motivation to get out of my rut of unemployment. I can't say how good things look at this point, but I still have enough energy to keep moving, even if the overly critical voice in my head loves to find new ways to subvert any progress I've made. The fact I'm aware of my current state of mind means I'm starting off on the right foot when I start to take action.

That said, I'm still uploading my Persona 3 fanfic, Through the Empty Spiral, on AO3 (30 chapters as of this post), and I'm trying to get my own original story off the ground. A few scenes have come to life, and a dozen characters are begging for their time to shine, so I have plenty of ideas to sculpt and polish. Once I have a more concrete design plan and an actual narrative timeline structured, I might rant about some of the problems I've run into and other concerns floating around my head as I break down this seemingly herculean project.

Between Rei and Yuuri Katsuki, I don't know who I love more.
And adorable, squee-inducing fanart doesn't help my poor heart.

Entertainment-wise, I've been watching season 2 of March Comes in Like a Lion and fighting every urge to adopt Rei Kiriyama as my son or little brother, and I admit I'm tempted to watch My Hero Academia due to my thirst for shonen anime kicking into overdrive after years of avoiding the genre. Long-running anime with substantial filler content are too great of a commitment and One Piece never did anything for me despite trying multiple times. Thus My Hero Academia, which seems to be running in concise, tight few-episode seasons, may be a safe investment at this point. Maybe a Japanese take on superheroes will provide a different kind of story I can get behind compared to the unavoidable decade-plus-and-still-running Marvel and DC typhoon. If all else fails, an anime reviewer I once followed in high school recommended Busou Renkin many years ago, and I'm enjoying it enough so far. And there is always JoJo's Bizarre Adventure if I'm that desperate. I have options.

My music listening habits has taken a strange turn this year. My Spotify playlists suddenly have 80s, 70s, and 60s hits that radio stations my parents listened to during my childhood, and a few recent pop hits slipped in too. The former is nostalgia hitting me in a sudden wave, and the latter is my best friend's bachelorette party playlist indoctrinating me for an entire weekend during the summer. Although by my own volition I have slowly become a small fan of Charli XCX (hence my Music Mood having "Black Roses" a while ago) after listening to some songs that appeared in The Sims 3 (which I can no longer play thanks to computer problems *sobs*), and I danced for joy when Marilyn Manson dropped his latest album a few weeks ago.

As for movies and video games? The last film I saw in theaters was It, which is both one of the better and more frustrating horror films as of late due to it squandering its diamond-quality potential with severe tonal inconsistencies and an abusive number of tactless and moment-killing jump scares. At least the Nostalgia Critic's review made me laugh harder than I ever had over his content in years. Beyond It and Saw 1, no films impacted me in a meaningful way this year.

The same can be said about video games, since I already discussed (in some detail) Mass Effect: Andromeda and Persona 5. However, I recently impulse-bought Yakuza Kiwami and called it crack on Twitter. The gameplay is addictive as hell, the characters bleed so much delicious ham and cheese, and I get to soak up more little (albeit fictional) things about Japanese culture and the yakuza, so call that game a net positive experience.

All of that said, seeking escapism and looking into myself for refuge against the insanity of the world only works for so long. That might be why I am feeling more melancholic and pessimistic than usual. Being thoughtful and introspective doesn't help when everyone in the world is screaming bloody murder over every little thing until nothing seems to matter anymore. We are in chaotic times, and I wish I knew how to navigate the colossal, seemingly planet-sized hurricane.

It's still too soon to render judgment on the state of things in 2017, but at least beloved celebrities weren't dying on a bimonthly basis like last year. (Oh, yes, I am still butthurt that David Bowie and Alan Rickman died within days of each other in January 2016. That was one of the worst weeks of my life.) Sure, the orange monkey still tweets like a tantrum-throwing toddler with immunity from being banned for some unfathomable reason, cock-measuring contests between the US and North Korea has me fear for Japan's and South Korea's safeties, and reputations are getting slaughtered over things as small as illogical accusations and blatant corruption, but at least getting stabbed with acupuncture needles every day still beats a shotgun to the balls every week! I'm bleeding, but I can still force myself to smile when I have to!

It's a miracle I still retain some sanity and have not succumbed to the "breaking news" bullshit the media farts every second by listening to political podcasts from different sects of the political spectrum back when it still mattered. I try my best to not become too political here despite this being my personal blog, but since I have had some people leave comments who did not agree with my thoughts at all, worrying constantly will do no one any good. You are your own worst critic, and I have said some scathing things about myself that other people haven't conceived of yet. It won't stop trolls and negative comments, but some self-awareness goes a long way.

So if any bridges are to be burned over what I say, so be it. Don't let me stop you. I'm not going to cry over the loss of the negative two hundred followers I actually have. Because I'm not going to throw a tantrum over every stupid thing the president and his administration says or does, and I'm not going to blindly follow a political side or cause solely on the basis of how moral an ideology or person supposedly is. A lot of people in the world are suffering and are in pain, every side has a slither of truth and a slither of falsehoods; the last thing I want is to develop a knee-jerk habit of devaluing a human being because they do not share ideas, educational background, or opinions with me. And yes, that means that I am not going to punch a Nazi unless in legitimate, legally defined self-defense because they tried to physically and deliberately cause injury to me (them simply existing does not count).

The state of the world at the moment... sadly.

Now that I got that out of the way and my readership fell to -10,000, I can be left to listen to so-bad-it's-fun music on Spotify and vent my frustrations with American politics into another potential novel that likely won't be published until I'm on my deathbed. Or watch teenagers with bizarre hair punch each other in crazy, nonsensical ways.

Bless the age of streaming, even with the obnoxious commercials. My soul feels slightly cleaner now that I can watch a good portion of anime on legitimate websites.

2016: What a %$#ing Year

Hello, people. It's me. I know I've been inactive for 75% of the year, but I'm still alive. I needed a long break, and now I'm feeling better, despite this year being... this year.

2016 was such a crappy year. I want to comfort the me from January who cried for days after Alan Rickman's death and try not to admit that the year would only get worse. Because, holy shit, 2016 got so much worse after January. Everyone and their mother has listed dozens of reasons why 2016 sucked ass, so I won't go on a long rant here today. It's Christmas and I'm feeling mellow at the moment. Not being bombarded by Christmas songs this year helped a ton.

Rather than dwell too much on the orange monkey that will lead my country and all the authoritarian politicians who want to drag us back to the Cold War era with bashing communism and Russia, I want to focus on some of the positives of this year in a quick post.

First, I have a job. Not a fantastic-paying job, but it's a job. I don't wake up dreading going there every morning despite cursing my hatred of mornings. I haven't had much time to write because I channeled most of my energy into looking for work and finding a place to live after I graduated in May. I said goodbye to suburban Pennsylvania and moved to the city. Things have settled for the most part, and I've adapted to my work environment well.

Second, I took a Japanese class to keep my brain preoccupied. More than anything I miss learning new things and having discussions about deep subjects, so the class was a good 10-week investment. Thankfully I am doing well enough that I can still indulge in my hobbies.

Third, I must confess... I got a Playstation 4.

I cannot look at the controller and not remember
Yahtzee's "rectangular clitoris" comment. XD

I only have the Game of the Year Edition of Dragon Age Inquisition, which has made me beyond thrilled to finally play that epilogue. If nothing else, Dragon Age has helped me get through this awful year. I met more internet friends to chat with, I got back into writing, and I sank way too many hours in a game series that has fried my nerves more than Mass Effect has done. Nothing has made me as emotional upset since the ending of Mass Effect 3, until I learned how much I wanted to fry eggs.

Anywho.

At this point in my life, I don't think I'm going to post here as often as I used to. This was always a personal blog for me and my hobbies, and as much as I wondered if I wanted to do more with this, I'm glad this has remained small. Hopefully next year will start off less awful, and maybe I'll be a bit more active.

If not, I'm on Twitter.

Meanwhile, my next big goal is to save up enough money so I can have a gaming PC. Since I have a Twitch account ready for that, I'll keep my mind open to streaming. Nothing too major.

"But what about that stupid Persona 3 fanfic you made a big deal about for, like, three years, Fangirl? Are you done with it yet?"

It'll be open to mass ridicule, insults, and humiliation very soon, actually, thanks for asking.

And Merry Christmas to you too.

In case I don't post anything again in the next few days... 

Happy Holidays and Happy New Year!

Can't Sleep: Super-Super Short Update

My next final exam is in six hours and I can't get a wink because I had too much soda and caffeine. Oh well. I should be ok so long as I make it to the classroom on time.

Anywho, I know this year has been sorely lacking in content, and I cannot apologize enough for it. Being a senior in college has put me on edge, especially when I can't tell anyone what the hell I'm doing anymore. When I'm not going mad from plans, rejected internship applications, and disappointed parents, I've been consuming media... in small pieces. In fact a rant should be coming up soon.

A pity my consoles have been packed away so that pushed back some of my plans, but I'll keep working on drafts and see what I can pump out when I'm in the mood. (Long-time readers know which review I've been neglecting.) I'll try harder, as writing is one of the few things I know I can do well and advertise to a potential employer... if they somehow find this blog and not go crazy from my insanity.


So yeah, this is a short update I wanted to pump out. Something new will come, I can promise you that for sure. I've been typing away all night in-between reluctant bursts of studying for the last few days and had a six hour long trip in my deep searching for some book I had the crazy idea of buying out of the blue.

...
Hey, hold on.

...Wait a damned minute is that...?

O_______o

WHELP, NOW THAT'S NOT REALLY DAMN DISTRACTING AT ALL.

Good night. I'm done. My brain and the caffeinated soda have played one too many stupid pranks on me for today.


...
Although sometimes I hate how oblivious and slow my brain can be.

Stupid tall dark-haired men and their deep voices and sexy accents confusing and flustering my asexual ovaries... >.<

August 2015 Update: WHELP THEN...

... This was an unproductive summer. Not school-wise at least. My research is still chugging along, despite a few snags here and there from the internet community and myself. The usual ups and downs of life always happen. I'm still being vague about my MegaTen research project because I need to be 100% sure I will release/publish the information. If I'm ever going into research someday beyond college, I need to understand the ins-and-outs before diving head-first into an empty swimming pool. But I can assure the two or three people who know and are curious about it that it is still being worked on.

Fun fact: I am one of the seemingly few people who
hates and does not rely on coffee to live.

April 2015 Update: Still Not Dead, But Worried and Tired

D-Don't get me st-started... *sniffle*

Life has a wonderful way of throwing a billion priorities at you, and you're left confused in the middle of a deep valley surrounded by mountains. Yes, due to fulfilling college group requirements, attending a few daunting classes, planning for summer, analyzing my research, and prepping for possible conferences, I ignored Rants From a Fangirl for a few months. Honestly, I've been feeling more tired than usual. Before Spring Break, I was so mentally fatigued that I often slept in for twelve hours on weekends and took naps in the middle of the week, only to wake up more unhappy and frustrated with myself.

I have been feeling better lately though. Several internship opportunities I signed up for have all turned me down, but I've taken the rejection a lot easier than I had earlier this semester. I'm still at a point in my MegaTen research that I can't openly say how things are going, but I'm still working on it for school. (Just the other day, in fact, I stayed up until 2am working on it.) If I can't get anything else right, I hope my project works out well enough for my undergraduate record to look promising.

I know that this blog is supposed to not focus on my personal life, so I'll now talk about all the nerdy shit I've been up to when I should have been writing for my blog!

Good Riddance, 2014!

I didn't manage to make any progress on anything during winter break, but sometimes taking time to sit back and do nothing can be therapeutic. At least I made a few expectations for myself before I stayed off most parts of the net for days. This blog isn't "professional" in the strictest or even loosest terms, but I still should get things done in a timely manner so the blog doesn't die without warning.

Anywho. Happy 2015.

Aches and Pains: Thanksgiving 2014 Update

Papers, papers, papers, binders, papers, papers, all-nighters, papers, presentations, journals, binders, powerpoints, carpal tunnel in both wrists, dead iPod every other day, papers, essays and more papers and papers. I hardly slipped online to edit posts because of all the last-minute semester scrambling, stressing, and hair-pulling. Analyzing my research data is time-consuming; it's not easy going through over 700 responses, especially the ones who stuck around for my survey and filled in the open-ended questions. I'll be needing a ton of caffeine-loaded soda to get all my stuff done. But the light from my laptop is starting to strain my eyes, and sitting is making my bum sore.

In other news, I'll be relaxing for Thanksgiving and play some Persona 4 Ultimax. I'm convinced Persona Q won't arrive until next week, much to my profound chagrin. Apparently my preorder will fall on my doorstep this week, so I'll cry if that doesn't happen. When I'm sick of MegaTen-related stuff (which might not happen b/c Ultimax and hopefully Q), I might play around with Mass Effect 3 to take some more last-second notes I may have forgotten about. Any other game I play will be a luxury.

Once winter break happens, I'll try to pump out a few posts to wrap up the year. I haven't done a music-related post in a while...

Eh... why the hell not? I haven't had the chance to talk about them anyway. Might have to pick up This Is War too for more context...

Anywho, everyone have a good week. Enjoy whatever you do to relax and be happy for a few days. If you don't celebrate Thanksgiving, I still wish you a healthy sanity. We all need it to function, y'know.

And may the people of Ferguson have peace. They need all the positive energy they can get so these tragedies are finally taken seriously and stopped for good.

Seriously, this is getting beyond obscene and lands dead in the territory of inexcusable. Whether you have a badge or not, whether you're an adult or kid, stop shooting everyone, America. You're making our whole country, even the sensible and responsible gun owners and collectors, look like incompetent trigger-happy vigilantes belonging perfectly in the twisted, despicable worlds of The Walking Dead or The Last of Us. PLEASE STOP SOLVING CONFUSING CONFRONTATIONS WITH PUTTING A BULLET IN SOMEONE. There is ALWAYS a third option. ALWAYS.

Halloween 2014 Update

Hiya, guys! The worst month I've ever lived through is finally over. All I have is one exam today and I am free from the clutches of stress... for the most part.

Even though it's Halloween, I'm not really going to dress up today. Too much stuff going on and I'd probably prefer spending the evening sleeping or writing. Feels like I hardly get any sleep anymore... and I want to keep hacking at my fanfic.

I wanted to let you guys know that I'm working on a few posts that I want to get out as soon as possible. One is greatly overdue and another is something that I'm in the mood to rant about. Hopefully I can pump out something soon, as I'm tired of having chronic writer's block over silly things. One of the things I'm working on would theoretically recommend me to go home and test out a few things; then I realized I played the game so many times that there is no reason for me to hyper analyze it and take too many excessively pointless notes.

Speaking of games, earlier this month (on that one awful day in fact) I finally beat Persona 2 Innocent Sin. I'm halfway through the most overrated MegaTen series! It's likely I might have to play the game over again or watch a walkthrough before I can judge it properly. I will say, however, that the gameplay is so obnoxious and tedious I really see why the fanbase is divided the way it is. In spite of my complaints about a ton if things, the characters and story were far better than - ... yeah, I'm not bothering to finish that. You guys know me too well by this point.

Someday I'll finish Eternal Punishment, but for now, I might move onto Soul Hackers. I haven't felt so good about a game so quickly in a really long time. If it keeps up, it may end up being one of my favorites.

Anywho, I hope you guys enjoy trick-or-treating or throwing parties or stealing candy from kids b/c no one has money for anything anymore. Be sure to enjoy some scary movies too. Hmm... I might want to watch Carrie again...

Happy Halloween!

Back to the Books... Again: September 2014 Update

Thankfully the first two weeks of classes ended unceremoniously. The workload is gonna be heavy though because I picked up a research methods class. Hopefully that skill will help me get a job somewhere. But then again, no one seems to know what will guarantee you getting a job anymore, which is disheartening.

That's pretty much me atm.

The incident from the end of the summer is in the past. Simply put, it made me realize how much I underestimate my talent in critical observation of others. It's good that I don't trust some people very easily, and it's something I got to stick with.

In lighter news, I haven't changed all that much. My blog has been leaning heavily towards video games for two years now, and I'm sure I have scared people off. There may be some of you who stick around since I ramble a lot about nerdy stuff. I talk about stuff that makes me happy at this point in my life and I hope some people can at least get a laugh or two at my being opinionated. So MegaTen might still be on my blog for a while, at least until I run into something else I want to talk about. Fangirl will still be a fangirl.

Meanwhile, my rooming arrangement is different this year and I got more posters and crap laying around. And, 对不起, crappy image quality is crappy. :P

I managed to plow through the majority of the show this summer. Sadly I stopped on the episode of all episodes, codenamed "The Purple Wedding", and I was never happier in my life. (Minus the HIM concert four years ago. So I lied.) Of course I will go back into the show and finish season three, since I'm hooked. Not as much as my mom though, who devoured the books and the episodes VERY quickly and is still detoxing. Season four can't come soon enough for her.

I did not buy A Link Between Worlds, but I have played a demo. Once I get money again, it might be in my library collection. Supposedly it's good, but my rant on Nintendo from a while back still weighs heavily on my mind.

But How to Train Your Dragon 2? I started to have faith in children's films again when the first film came out. Now it's really damn strong thanks to this. Damn it, if I ever have children, boys or girls, I'll show them these movies along with The Hunchback of Notre Dame.

So many hedgehogs... I got the two in the middle for a really cheap price on sale around Christmas. They were lonely and I couldn't help but take them home. Then I realized I had two scarves I never use much, slipped them on the duo and named them Pollux and Castor. Heh, heh, heh. To make it better, Pollux's left ear sits funny as does Castor's right ear. Heh, heh.

Ok, I'm done. Don't smack me. XD

What kind of young adult would I be without a messy desk? Moonlight, Soul Hackers, The Sims 3, HIM, my PS Vita, and a Zelda lanyard. Sometimes I question how feminine I am.

And I already posted this on Twitter a while back, but I took a pic of my copy of Quantum Devil Saga. Yes, I do exist in the real world.

Funnily enough, I'm taking a general history class on Asian Civilizations pre-1500 CE and we briefly touched on Hinduism. Let's say that a billion lightbulbs flashed in my mind as I was hearing so many terms that I recognize from playing Digital Devil Saga and just MegaTen in general (like atma, samsara, soma, etc). It's a beautiful feeling to know how video games can still enrich one's life beyond simple entertainmant.

Anyway, I'm back to studying, writing, and stuff. My fanfic is about 75% done at this point, but I might have to do another draft to organize stuff better. Thank god I'm not an author, because I think I understand a little bit why George R.R. Martin takes forever on A Song of Ice and Fire.

Help.

March 2014 Update: Me and Video Game Difficulty

Exams and homework and Spring Break and DDS-Net and Skype stole my attention from this blog. ...My bad. ^_^'

By this point, just assume there will be a month or two per year when I suddenly vanish or provide no content. It doesn't help if I have writer's block. Like I do now. It's not just Rants From a Fangirl; my fanfic hasn't grown much in terms of length. Maybe I'm still burned out from the October 4th subplot ordeal or maybe I'm pretty close to the worst part of the original game: the horrible November-December angst festival of awful pacing.

Anywho.

To combat my everyday laziness and persistent afflictions of writer's block, I've made tons of progress in Shin Megami Tensei IV. My play hours sat at 15 for so many months, but now I've added another 17 or so in the span of a week. It's not a bad game, but the first several hours were just... frustrating to put it mildly.

Either Medusa - or Minotaur depending on your luck - can be a lot harder to fight than this video makes it look. I was not lucky enough to have as many useful skills for my demons. (Plus, my Flynn is more oriented to physical rather than magic attacks.) Then add my unfortunate luck in recruiting and negotiating with demons, often to the point I would run out of items, macca, HP, MP, or all of the above. I died... many times. I lost count. But if I can make a humiliating estimate, I died at least twice per hour. For twenty hours straight.

"FANGIRL, PLS! Y U SUK SO MUCH!!!!"

This game is the reason I can never go back to Persona 4 Golden. This game destroyed whatever faith I had in my already minuscule abilities and skills as a gamer. Shin Megami Tensei IV made me commit to forever starting off at the lowest or second-lowest difficulty setting in a video game. No exceptions.

Whenever I pick up a new game, I used to sometimes start on the easiest difficulty. Now, it will be a mandatory standard.

Feel free to call me a wimp, a weakling, a little girl, and a child crying over a video game that a manly man can handle but I can't. Considering this is how the video game culture can be at times, I'm not shocked anymore. I am well aware that I'm not the most competitive, the strongest, or the brightest tool in the shed, but for me, entertainment and immersion is my preference. If getting get used to a game's mechanics involves asking for help, consulting a guide, or lowering the difficulty, I'm not ashamed to do so. Besides, the guys on DDS-Net have scolded me for my newly cemented approach.

Now that I'm more interested in playing MegaTen games, I've started to notice that many fans in the fanbase have admitted to going online or asking friends for help on boss battles, negotiation techniques, and demon fusion. Sure, there is still some mocking and teasing going about to separate the chosen elitists from the demon chow, but I have not met one MegaTen fan who said, "Oh, yeah! I totally beat the demi-fiend in Digital Devil Saga in one try without any guides!" or "You can't beat Persona 2 Innocent Sin without a guide for persona fusions? You really suck!" If you are such a person, most people would assume you are lying through your teeth.

I once suggested on Skype for someone to play Nocturne on Hard Mode without dying once. One person - who first played Nocturne as a child - nearly started crying. Another told me to stop taking so many crazy pills. The rest said to leave that idea by the curb, run VERY far way, and never look back. Because... need I say anything more than check TV Tropes for the short answer?

Torturously stupid ideas aside, once I scaled down the difficulty of SMTIV, I enjoyed the game so much more. I went through normal mode for twenty hours before finally giving up my masochistic crusade. I sacrificed my pride and vowed to beat the game, even if everyone mocks me over "EASY MODO". So, believe it or not, I may review the game not long after I complete it! From what some friends told me, I'm at the halfway point and coming closer to the alignment lock. Whether I will be Lawful, Chaotic, or Neutral will be revealed soon.

My overall feelings of the game will be saved for once I review it. I don't want to cause a big stink like I did for Persona 4. But I will say that I'm enjoying SMTIV FAR BETTER than P4 overall.

Call me an elitist all you want, but I have more experience in school kids saving the world. Fighting through the demon apocalypse is still pretty new for me. I ain't a full fledged member who's committed to either side of the fence.

Once I'm done this game - and either Strange Journey or SMTI - I may have my answer.

Now excuse me, but I just ran into my archnemesis while wandering around Tokyo. And I'm at level 44.

LET THE BLOODBATH BEGIN!!

"PSA From a Fangirl" Has Been Upgraded

I'm on Twitter as of today. Yep. I'm a terrible hypocrite, I know.

Well this is just something I want to test out for a while, like I did with Facebook before the site and my "friends" harassed me with constant images, locations, and info I could not care about. So now I'm just using Twitter to follow the sites and people I like online. Since Rants From a Fangirl is listed as my website, I'm still going by Melanie Light (or Fangirl) as my handle. If I post something new here, I might post a link there in case I get enough followers. Considering how few I have here, I doubt it.

Anywho, this pretty much means my "PSA From a Fangirl" section here will be done. I won't have much reason to make minor updates on my state of being when I'm not vomiting nonsensical articles. That being said, I'll still probably be snarky and opinionated as ever. It gives me slightly more ground to cover without needing to jump on the Youtube audio and video medium. And in case something big comes up, like a protest against online surveillance or the revival of SOPA-related laws, it might be easier to participate that way.

Otherwise, this blog is still my baby. It's still small, but I'm keeping at it. Besides, I still have Mass Effect 3 and it's awful controversy to talk about. Then some guys from DDS-Net suggested I tackle Shin Megami Tensei IV. I'm thinking about other stuff too, especially since a young adult novel I actually liked may have been butchered horrendously thanks to the Hollywood machine. And since I'm a fan of the source material, I need to bring my battle armor and face the beast.

There is so much wrong with this, I don't know where to begin.


Meanwhile, when I'm not wanting to harm my computer, I realize that the semester is 33% over already and I'm confused out of my mind. Time doesn't seem to exist or make sense anymore. I still haven't adjusted to that yet... But for now, I need to get through this busy week. Then I'll be homebound. I will attack my adorable cats, bug my family, and squeeze in some time with my PS3. Once I get more ideas on what I can talk about, new material will come out.

But man, Vampire Academy... those books were actually good and then this movie happened... *sobs*

Out From Under a Rock!: First 2014 Update

Please don't kill me! I'm back for realz, I swearz!

Looks like I got so caught up in vacation and breaks that... well... I neglected my blog again. Whoops.

Thus in a vain attempt to make my two or three imaginary readers forgive me for my crimes, let me say I have been pretty busy during the holidays. Real-life stuff, of course. Mostly enjoying a mellow and agnostic Christmas, freezing my ass off thanks to below 0 Celsius weather that swept the east coast lately, realizing my cousins are counting down the months to when they can get me legally smashed, lamenting my B+ average grades this semester, etc.

Otherwise, I've been gaming. No shock.

Pre-Thanksgiving Update

我累。我很累。我的手痛了。(1)

...

A nostalgic train ride with Linkin Park, an eleven-slided powerpoint presentation on a cultural world problem, a nine paged essay on an environmental problem close to home, AND a ten page essay on how terrorism affects a country's GDP.

...

Worst... procrastinating... EVER.

...

对不起，我累。我需要去睡觉。(2)

...

I miss my big bed...

~~~~~Notes:~~~~~

(1) - I am tired. I am very tired. My hand hurts.

(2) - I'm sorry, I'm tired. I'm going to bed.

Blue Screen of Uncertainty

I admit... it's been a long while since I last edited my Mass Effect 2 review. Call it writer's block or lack of inspiration: both mean that it might not come out for a while.

Lately I've just been thinking. A lot. I tend to do that when something feels off. Something's been bugging me and I don't entirely know how to handle it. And my blog has been pumping half-assed content as a result. The last thing I need is a break, as my infrequent updates are pretty much that. On the other hand, it'd suck if my blog is like a comatose patient on life support.

Simply put, Fangirl's having a bit of a crisis.

June 2013 Update: E-cow-nomics

I know it's off the internet...
But even a pic I took would make it
tiny to read...

Because I'm bored and having writer's block on my blog. Call it me selling out or lazy, that's fine. I'll get off my ass and finish my Mass Effect 2 review... or maybe beat Persona 4 Golden.

My brain is in a state similar to fried chicken because I'm spending too much time writing my Persona 3 fanfic. An activity that originally started out of boredom back during the spring semester has exploded into a 400+ page, six Word documented project that is still incomplete. ...I still don't know why I'm still writing it. At this rate, it'll be longer than Les Miserables.

Otherwise Fangirl's life is... is... is... um...

...I got a new poster to take to college. It'll proudly sit right next to the one on the menstrual cycle I got from the Mutter Museum in Philadelphia.

Yeah. This thing. XD

I just love dry, quirky humor like this.

... This might be me selling out, but oh well. My fanfic destroyed my brain. That's a good excuse... right?

Introducing the explanation of 21 economic models... using cows! Too bad the font is too tiny to read of the picture...

Socialism: You have two cows. You give one to your neighbor.

Communism: You have two cows. The State takes both and gives you some milk.

Fascism: You have two cows. The State takes both then sells you some milk.

Nazism: You have two cows. The State takes both and shoots you.

Bureaucratism: You have two cows. The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then throws the milk away.

Traditional Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.

Surrealism: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.

American Corporation: You have two cows. You sell one and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow had dropped dead.

Venture Capitalism - Icelandic Corporation: You have two cows. You sell all three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release.
The public then buys your bull.

French Corporation: You have two cows. You go on strike, organise a riot, and block the roads, because you want three cows.

Japanese Corporation: You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called "Cowkimon" and market it worldwide.

German Corporation: You have two cows. You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.

Italian Corporation: You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. You decide to have lunch.

Russian Corporation: You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have forty-two cows. You count again and learn you have two cows.

Swiss Corporation: You have five thousand cows. None of them belong to you. You charge the owners for storing them.

Chinese Corporation: You have two cows. You have three hundred people milking them. You claim you have full employment, and high bovine productivity. You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.

Indian Corporation: You have two cows. You worship them.

British Corporation: You have two cows. Both are mad.

Iraqi Corporation: Everyone thinks you have lots of cows. You tell them you have none. No one believes you, so they bomb you and invade your country. You still have no cows, but at least you are a part of Democracy.

Australian Corporation: You have two cows. Business seems pretty good. You close offices and go for a few beers to celebrate.

New Zealand Corporation: You have two cows. The one on the left looks very attractive.


And everyone gets made fun of. :)


Back to writing I guess... *sigh* I need something to make me smile...

^///_///^

... Someone make this happen. NOW.

Fangirl's Lazy Post on E3... Or Why the Xbone Is in Trouble, Part 2

The whole internet pretty much summed up my general view of what happened this week. Microsoft shot themselves in the foot, and Sony laughed their asses off. While doing so, they did the simple trick of giving the people what they want: now they have us under their spell until they rip the rug from under our feet. It'll happen, it's business, I assure you. Meanwhile Nintendo did their own thing - as usual - and presented themselves well.

Since Sony and Nintendo tend to get my money in some way, shape, or form, I'll get a Wii U and/or a PS4 once the libraries have expanded. It'll probably be when I'm done college and have a stable income.

April 2013 Update

Holy crap... Only three more weeks until my summer vacation begins. ...And it's hot, humid, and miserable. I want the cold back; I miss winter so much.

Maybe I need to move to the Arctic and meet a few polar bears...

Credit due to owner.

Anywho. Updates and ramblings...

Political Compass, Many Months Later

Last time I took this political quiz, almost exactly one year ago...

Your political compass

Economic Left/Right: -1.88

Social Libertarian/Authoritarian: -3.74

Now...

Your political compass

Economic Left/Right: -6.62

Social Libertarian/Authoritarian: -4.82

Holy crap.

The moderately liberal libertarian transformed into an extremely communistic libertarian. My Republican best friend might not be happy about that. @_@ And like many people, I am still disenchanted by the choices in politicians. So I guess we're all in the same boat about something.

See where you fall: http://www.politicalcompass.org/test

Happy 2013!!: An Update

Lo and behold, everyone was wrong about December 21, 2012. Not only was 2012 one of the stupidest movies ever made, but the Mayan calendar technically sees the day as the end of a time period and the beginning of a new one. Kind of like a "new "year", I guess. Nothing happened. I bet at 16:00 Eastern Time, the Japanese were either asleep or laughing at our ludicrous claims of "ZOMFG, doomsday!!!!!!"

And I lived to see me birthday. And laughed. Very loudly.

I was busy plowing through repetitive missions
with the Mako while y'all caused a ruckus at 12 am.

Anywho, Happy New Year to the few individuals who read my blog!

2012 was a pain in the neck. I would get caught up in college life, video games, music, etc. and forget to update. This may be because I don't like treating this as a "here's what I'm doing today" sort of blog. I've had diaries in the past, but I'd barely use up ten pages. Writing down every single mundane thing I do or think about never had much appeal to me. Sure, there has been a few posts when I would briefly talk about what I've been up to, but I only want to write posts when I feel like it. As a result, I have gone on for weeks without any content.

We'll see how 2013 goes. I make resolutions and act when I need to, not when people cheer because the clock struck 0:00 on the first day of 2013. Ah, cynicism! ^_^

Before I disappear again, let me say a few more things.

Thanks for the those who voted in my small poll. I wanted to get a sense on how to even talk about Mass Effect. Since I quickly became a fervent fan over the summer [and came up frequently in my posts] it seemed inevitable that I would have a desire to ramble on talk about it. Because so much could be said, I wanted an idea on how willing some of you would be when you read the posts. Currently three drafts have been composed over the past few months: two of which still need extensive editing before being ready to be put out.

My dad gave me Mass Effect Trilogy for Christmas, so now I have extra copies of 2 and 3 as well as a physical copy of the first game. Until I played through it a few times, it will be the first post on the series as a whole. In other words, this whole thing might take a really long time. Once Spring semester starts, I will not have access to my PS3 and the game will be put on hold. For now, I'm trying to play it as much as possible to get a feel for it. Plus I have heard about how frustrating the glitches can be. The PS3 version of Mass Effect seems to have all new problems that have ruined the experience (i.e. game files not being transferable to Mass Effect 2, audio issues, mini game issues, etc.)

First impressions?

After spending about 40 hours on the game and completing one of my two save files... It's a whole different kind of difficult. Frustrating at times, but it was definitely worth it. Thankfully my experience was only ruined by problems that most likely existed with the original XBox 360 version. No game-breaking crashes, no mini-game problems. Heck, I'm only happy I could transfer my file into Mass Effect 2 without any penalty. Now I can experience everything from start to finish, the right way.

Enough about video games though.

The other week I had the chance to see The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey in 3D. Hearing mostly negative things about it from critics - hmph... figures - I got a bit worried. Diehard Tolkien fans, however, seemed a bit less angry about the film. (Can't say about the 3D gimmick though...) As much as I loved film versions of The Lord of the Rings, I'm far from being a Tolkien fan. He put so much content and love in Middle Earth that I'd have to dedicate my whole life to his fiction. I'd be open-minded about the lore, but it's too overwhelming to dive into. At least what little I have seen (and read) the material is not too hard to swallow.

Anywho.

The Hobbit was probably one of the only books I ever enjoyed reading for school. Even then, the extremely particular and detailed notes and tests we had to take nearly killed the experience. So I reread it in my free time once or twice. So, yeah, I was damn happy to see a film adaptation.

Looks like I'll have to review it sometime soon. I could easily rant on about it without trouble. I still have ideas, people, I just need the motivation to write sometimes.

Well, Happy New Year everyone!

September 2012 Update - College!

I just finished up my first week of classes as I sit on a bed that is not my own. Things have been going well so far. For the first time in months I have some kind of schedule - and life - with as few video games as possible. It was great for me to play my PS3 to death. Too bad I have to wait a long while for Assassin's Creed 3...

I'm adapting fairly well, making new friends, and enjoying my classes. (Just waiting for that one test to show how hard college can be...) Only the extremely social, no privacy aspect is what I'm not enjoying much. Icebreakers have always been the bane of my existence. The four days of orientation had nothing but such small talk and I was really to explode. Thankfully, my roommate and I get along pretty well.

Nearly everyone is gone this weekend so I had the peace and quiet to finally make a small update. :)

At this rate, I plan to review music like I did during my early days. There are some drafts that need editing and finishing, and I brushed some dust off my Pandora account. I'm planning on finding some new material.

In the meantime, I'm waiting hopefully for October 29th and early 2013. XX - Two Decades of Love Metal and Tears on Tape are coming! Even Bentley Jones has something coming out October 24th! *Fangirl squee* ^////^