'Detroit: Become Human', Part 1

Japan, why do you always get the superior game covers?

A full month has passed, and the fever of this infection has lessened somewhat. I have a terrible habit of not writing down or documenting knowledge in my head, which has probably made life difficult for the coworkers I left behind after I walked out of a promise/job/contract for the first time in my life. Once I get the motivation to do something about it, oftentimes it's too late (see my STILL incomplete Mass Effect 3 review). I plan to avoid that outcome this time by writing down everything I can about my experience with Detroit: Become Human.

Although I don't want a certain active actor from the project to drop enough trivia and fun facts that may warp my impressions to the point I forget to be as impartial as possible. I do recommend watching Bryan's streams though. He's a cool guy. Until fandom bullshit corrupts him. Pls don't ruin his and his wife's lives, internet and fangirls/fanboys, I implore you.

Spoilers inbound!

‘Star Wars: The Last Jedi’

I’ve had it. I'm done. I am so done.

This is the last straw. I’m at my limit. I can't take this anymore.

Fuck Disney.

Fuck Hollywood.

Fuck the trendy franchise addition.

Fuck the obsession with cinematic universes.

Fuck the corporate capitalist cult that strangles creativity in the name of profit.

Fuck Star Wars: The Last Jedi.

And fuck me for feeding money to this detestable beast.

... Feel free to keep count of how many times I curse in this post. It's one of those, people, so strap in tight. This rant-review hybrid is not for the faint of heart.

Spoilers, because I have succumbed to the power of the Dark Side, consequences be damned.

'Free!', Male Beauty, and Fanservice

OH, GOD DAMN IT, 2017, STOP KICKING ME IN MY OVERLY ANALYTICAL AND CYNICAL ASS WITH STUPID SHIT I'M SUPPOSED TO HATE! THESE STRANGE FEELS BURNING IN MY HEART HURT LIKE A MOTHERFU--

*clears throat*

Well, that was very undignified of me. My apologies.

Despite the obnoxious recent track record of consuming media that has pushed me beyond the comfort zone I maintained for much of my life, I don't feel particularly conflicted or violated in any psychological manner in regards to Free!. Thank whatever deity or deities that do or do not exist for that reprieve.

Over the course of a week  last month, I have marathoned Free! with its two seasons, handful of OVAs, and prequel film. After trying to have no expectations for the series' quality, I found myself really enjoying Free!. And felt feels. Felt enough feels that I laughed. And cried. Good to know that I'm still a woman.

That's the short story. The long story requires me to go back to 2012, when a little known Hollywood film caused a bit of controversy in some circles thanks to some good old double standards regarding good old fanservice.

Nov 2017 Update: Trying [and Failing] to Dodge Bullets

Hello, dear readers!

Real life remains a priority for me, even though some mild depression has dampened my motivation to get out of my rut of unemployment. I can't say how good things look at this point, but I still have enough energy to keep moving, even if the overly critical voice in my head loves to find new ways to subvert any progress I've made. The fact I'm aware of my current state of mind means I'm starting off on the right foot when I start to take action.

That said, I'm still uploading my Persona 3 fanfic, Through the Empty Spiral, on AO3 (30 chapters as of this post), and I'm trying to get my own original story off the ground. A few scenes have come to life, and a dozen characters are begging for their time to shine, so I have plenty of ideas to sculpt and polish. Once I have a more concrete design plan and an actual narrative timeline structured, I might rant about some of the problems I've run into and other concerns floating around my head as I break down this seemingly herculean project.

Between Rei and Yuuri Katsuki, I don't know who I love more.
And adorable, squee-inducing fanart doesn't help my poor heart.

Entertainment-wise, I've been watching season 2 of March Comes in Like a Lion and fighting every urge to adopt Rei Kiriyama as my son or little brother, and I admit I'm tempted to watch My Hero Academia due to my thirst for shonen anime kicking into overdrive after years of avoiding the genre. Long-running anime with substantial filler content are too great of a commitment and One Piece never did anything for me despite trying multiple times. Thus My Hero Academia, which seems to be running in concise, tight few-episode seasons, may be a safe investment at this point. Maybe a Japanese take on superheroes will provide a different kind of story I can get behind compared to the unavoidable decade-plus-and-still-running Marvel and DC typhoon. If all else fails, an anime reviewer I once followed in high school recommended Busou Renkin many years ago, and I'm enjoying it enough so far. And there is always JoJo's Bizarre Adventure if I'm that desperate. I have options.

My music listening habits has taken a strange turn this year. My Spotify playlists suddenly have 80s, 70s, and 60s hits that radio stations my parents listened to during my childhood, and a few recent pop hits slipped in too. The former is nostalgia hitting me in a sudden wave, and the latter is my best friend's bachelorette party playlist indoctrinating me for an entire weekend during the summer. Although by my own volition I have slowly become a small fan of Charli XCX (hence my Music Mood having "Black Roses" a while ago) after listening to some songs that appeared in The Sims 3 (which I can no longer play thanks to computer problems *sobs*), and I danced for joy when Marilyn Manson dropped his latest album a few weeks ago.

As for movies and video games? The last film I saw in theaters was It, which is both one of the better and more frustrating horror films as of late due to it squandering its diamond-quality potential with severe tonal inconsistencies and an abusive number of tactless and moment-killing jump scares. At least the Nostalgia Critic's review made me laugh harder than I ever had over his content in years. Beyond It and Saw 1, no films impacted me in a meaningful way this year.

The same can be said about video games, since I already discussed (in some detail) Mass Effect: Andromeda and Persona 5. However, I recently impulse-bought Yakuza Kiwami and called it crack on Twitter. The gameplay is addictive as hell, the characters bleed so much delicious ham and cheese, and I get to soak up more little (albeit fictional) things about Japanese culture and the yakuza, so call that game a net positive experience.

All of that said, seeking escapism and looking into myself for refuge against the insanity of the world only works for so long. That might be why I am feeling more melancholic and pessimistic than usual. Being thoughtful and introspective doesn't help when everyone in the world is screaming bloody murder over every little thing until nothing seems to matter anymore. We are in chaotic times, and I wish I knew how to navigate the colossal, seemingly planet-sized hurricane.

It's still too soon to render judgment on the state of things in 2017, but at least beloved celebrities weren't dying on a bimonthly basis like last year. (Oh, yes, I am still butthurt that David Bowie and Alan Rickman died within days of each other in January 2016. That was one of the worst weeks of my life.) Sure, the orange monkey still tweets like a tantrum-throwing toddler with immunity from being banned for some unfathomable reason, cock-measuring contests between the US and North Korea has me fear for Japan's and South Korea's safeties, and reputations are getting slaughtered over things as small as illogical accusations and blatant corruption, but at least getting stabbed with acupuncture needles every day still beats a shotgun to the balls every week! I'm bleeding, but I can still force myself to smile when I have to!

It's a miracle I still retain some sanity and have not succumbed to the "breaking news" bullshit the media farts every second by listening to political podcasts from different sects of the political spectrum back when it still mattered. I try my best to not become too political here despite this being my personal blog, but since I have had some people leave comments who did not agree with my thoughts at all, worrying constantly will do no one any good. You are your own worst critic, and I have said some scathing things about myself that other people haven't conceived of yet. It won't stop trolls and negative comments, but some self-awareness goes a long way.

So if any bridges are to be burned over what I say, so be it. Don't let me stop you. I'm not going to cry over the loss of the negative two hundred followers I actually have. Because I'm not going to throw a tantrum over every stupid thing the president and his administration says or does, and I'm not going to blindly follow a political side or cause solely on the basis of how moral an ideology or person supposedly is. A lot of people in the world are suffering and are in pain, every side has a slither of truth and a slither of falsehoods; the last thing I want is to develop a knee-jerk habit of devaluing a human being because they do not share ideas, educational background, or opinions with me. And yes, that means that I am not going to punch a Nazi unless in legitimate, legally defined self-defense because they tried to physically and deliberately cause injury to me (them simply existing does not count).

The state of the world at the moment... sadly.

Now that I got that out of the way and my readership fell to -10,000, I can be left to listen to so-bad-it's-fun music on Spotify and vent my frustrations with American politics into another potential novel that likely won't be published until I'm on my deathbed. Or watch teenagers with bizarre hair punch each other in crazy, nonsensical ways.

Bless the age of streaming, even with the obnoxious commercials. My soul feels slightly cleaner now that I can watch a good portion of anime on legitimate websites.

Netflix's 'Death Note': Another Awful American Adaptation

Once upon a time in the scenic but boring Philadelphia suburbs, a girl quietly took notes and waited for her teacher to return as her classmates gossiped and played pranks. The boy in front of her annoyed her especially with his radiant gold hair, light skin that tanned into a crisp Hollywood celebrity glow, and pearl-white teeth. He always sat in front of her, but not by choice; students sat alphabetically in rows for every period from the first day of the school year to the last. A jock and one of the smartest kids in her grade, that boy bragged about his supposedly authentic Italian heritage and basked in attention, adoration, expensive cars, and education awards. He was not the one she hated most in the school, but even if he was moderately attractive, she was physically unable to say a positive thing about him as a human being. She once slammed the back of his head with her history textbook for making an ignorantly sexist comment, shocking the class who never thought the quiet, muted girl living in her own mental dreamscape had a vindictive streak.

Given the right environment with the right people, that girl would rant and debate for hours on anything that she felt passionate about. Instead, she sealed her lips shut, kept only four friends, and navigated through eight years of Catholic schooling. She never knew what group she belonged to - nerds, goths, gamers, or whatever labels were cool in the late 2000s - but she knew herself and her interests enough to not feel completely lost when she was alone. After she graduated high school, she kept her friends and burned the names and faces of her peers from her memory. They never cared for her in school, so why should they ever try to reach out to her now? She feared that if she tried to remember them, hatred for them would fester and manifest into urges too "logical" and compelling to not act on. Instead, she poured her energy into studies and work to live a productive life, and she allowed herself to relax with entertainment to cope with emotions not respected in a post-industrial society.

I am glad Death Notes aren't real, because I would definitely be one of the worst people who could ever have the power to murder at will. If I did have it, I'd be fighting the temptation to get rid of any of my Catholic school peers who dare to try to contact me instead of targeting the politicians that have allowed the political, economic, and cultural capitals of the US to become ideologically cultish cesspools. Imagine Stephen King's Carrie if she was a Myers Briggs INTJ like Augustus Caesar and channeled Rei's stoicism from Evangelion. I still resent the people I went to school with, but I am aware enough of my feelings that I do everything in my power to not allow them to mutate into an uncontrollable monster that consumes me. That is something someone like Light Yagami would completely fail to understand... but at least he's not Light Turner.

Fuck. He looks like that douchebag I sat behind.

Oh yes, people, I watched the Netflix adaptation of Death Note. And I have opinions. Strong opinions.

Spoilers, if anyone cares enough about this predictable dumpster fire.
Oh, and as an added disclaimer, I do get a bit political given some of the ire American adaptations of Japanese fiction tend to stir on the lovely English-speaking side of the interwebs.

Promise Lost ~ A Reflection on 'Mass Effect: Andromeda'

Enough of the eagerness and euphoria has left my bloodstream that I can look at Mass Effect: Andromeda a little more objectively. If I were to write a review today, I would align myself with those who gave the game a 7/10. By my rating system, that'd be about 3.5/5. Regardless of whether people think it's a good score or not, I cannot condone the gaming industry's skewed and bullshit re-interpretation of ratings for games, and I condemn the bombardment of low ratings from players who hate the superficial faults and call the entire game a dumpster fire based on said shallow nitpicks. Also, a budget of $40 million isn't that much money in the realm of AAA games, especially when this industry is getting so massive that Hollywood will soon be sweating bullets. Mass Effect: Andromeda's problems vastly eclipse quantitative numbers regarding finances and "five years".

THAT SAID. I may still say I love this game in many ways, but when I wake up and smell the coffee this game is a disappointment. Mass Effect: Andromeda took the franchise one step forward and two steps back for a variety of reasons more harmful than "bad animations". And above all, I fear the way Bioware will address these problems, much like every single major developer in the AAA market has done for almost a decade. Now that the Bioware Montreal team which worked on Andromeda is being downsized, my fears are coming true.

Without a doubt, this series deserves better that what we got, but I want to pick at the miniscule specs of gold that is worth preserving and improving upon.

Here there be some SPOILERS.

Entertaining, Erratic, and Embarrassing

This is the second year of watching E3 with my pals, mainly to pass the time and to take a break from writing my research paper. Considering it's nothing but a show for investors to examine and determine whether a major company in the gaming industry needs support or not, this E3 was surprisingly fun to watch... depending on the presenter.

Because I'm an amateur and a weirdo, I'll make my opinions on the three-day fiesta as brief as possible.

Good Riddance, 2014!

I didn't manage to make any progress on anything during winter break, but sometimes taking time to sit back and do nothing can be therapeutic. At least I made a few expectations for myself before I stayed off most parts of the net for days. This blog isn't "professional" in the strictest or even loosest terms, but I still should get things done in a timely manner so the blog doesn't die without warning.

Anywho. Happy 2015.

Aches and Pains: Thanksgiving 2014 Update

Papers, papers, papers, binders, papers, papers, all-nighters, papers, presentations, journals, binders, powerpoints, carpal tunnel in both wrists, dead iPod every other day, papers, essays and more papers and papers. I hardly slipped online to edit posts because of all the last-minute semester scrambling, stressing, and hair-pulling. Analyzing my research data is time-consuming; it's not easy going through over 700 responses, especially the ones who stuck around for my survey and filled in the open-ended questions. I'll be needing a ton of caffeine-loaded soda to get all my stuff done. But the light from my laptop is starting to strain my eyes, and sitting is making my bum sore.

In other news, I'll be relaxing for Thanksgiving and play some Persona 4 Ultimax. I'm convinced Persona Q won't arrive until next week, much to my profound chagrin. Apparently my preorder will fall on my doorstep this week, so I'll cry if that doesn't happen. When I'm sick of MegaTen-related stuff (which might not happen b/c Ultimax and hopefully Q), I might play around with Mass Effect 3 to take some more last-second notes I may have forgotten about. Any other game I play will be a luxury.

Once winter break happens, I'll try to pump out a few posts to wrap up the year. I haven't done a music-related post in a while...

Eh... why the hell not? I haven't had the chance to talk about them anyway. Might have to pick up This Is War too for more context...

Anywho, everyone have a good week. Enjoy whatever you do to relax and be happy for a few days. If you don't celebrate Thanksgiving, I still wish you a healthy sanity. We all need it to function, y'know.

And may the people of Ferguson have peace. They need all the positive energy they can get so these tragedies are finally taken seriously and stopped for good.

Seriously, this is getting beyond obscene and lands dead in the territory of inexcusable. Whether you have a badge or not, whether you're an adult or kid, stop shooting everyone, America. You're making our whole country, even the sensible and responsible gun owners and collectors, look like incompetent trigger-happy vigilantes belonging perfectly in the twisted, despicable worlds of The Walking Dead or The Last of Us. PLEASE STOP SOLVING CONFUSING CONFRONTATIONS WITH PUTTING A BULLET IN SOMEONE. There is ALWAYS a third option. ALWAYS.

A Miserables Cup of Tea Isn't for Me

Joyful day.

I don't have a fond opinion of Les Miserables, but it hardly bothers me enough to get me worked up for the rest of my life about it. It's not the kind of fiction I've experienced that scarred me permanently. Yet this story has tried four times to stir a response from me, and I had a different reaction each time.

The musical version by far has the most inconsistent yet paradoxically consistent track record: it has always been a profoundly disappointing experience short of such infamous torture sessions as Gladiator and The Dark Knight. My high school's version of Les Miserables put me to sleep thanks to the lousy and chaotic sound production; the 25th anniversary had me mock a Jonas brother through the entire second act; and the 2012 film adaptation made me take out my iPod to play sudoku and alleviate my torment.

Just as I was ready to throw the towel and forever give up on Les Miserables, I found another film version to take a stab at on Netflix: the 1992 one with Liam Neeson. I was happy with the glorious absence of singing, and enjoyed it for being a decent movie. Unfortunately by November 1st, the movie is possibly gone forever for streaming. For shame.

Anywho. As a whole I can conclude from my experiences - as I presumed back in 2012 - that for me Les Miserables the musical has a competent source material that fails as a story adaptation.

I love you too. Spoilers ahoy.

'Persona 4' Part II

The guys at the DDS-Net forums are pretty laid-back and cool people. No massive wars started yet. No internet drama and bullshit erupted. Since it's still a small community, I managed to find my voice among a sea of veteran fans.

Not long after I published part 1 of my review, someone started a Persona 4 thread. I laid down my opinion of the game and tried to be as honest as I could. Within hours, people flooded in with their own few cents. Just recently, a few of us got heated over a tiny aspect of the game. Had someone not pointed that out, the discussion could've blown up into full-scale war.


It's funny how I am most experienced with the Persona series, but I have more in common with those who like other SMT games.

I have... TONS of issues with this game. Let's say that this can be the ending of Mass Effect 3 levels of rage.

Spoilers ahoy.

Persona 4: the Golden Rant

This is an emergency.

I really need to get this off my chest. All progress on my review is on halt because of my emotions. I cannot make any progress and cover Persona 4 objectively without tossing out moldy food from the fridge. I have so much beef over so many things so trivial that I have no idea how to not make an unfair, unbalanced review. And I swear to God this is the last teaser for the review! I am sorry, I am sorry, I am sorry, I am so very sorry!! So let me just say this stuff now before we get another Persona 3, Part 4.

I am glad Gamestop charged $50 for Persona 4 a few years ago. It would have been a big mistake to invest in it that soon. Because if you are interested in Atlus and their Shin Megami Tensei franchise like I was, Persona 4 and Persona 4 Golden are the worst gateway games to try first.


Before anyone makes a doll of Fangirl and starts tearing her limbs off... HEAR ME OUT.

...BTW some SPOILERS run amok.

Fangirl's Lazy Post on E3... Or Why the Xbone Is in Trouble, Part 2

The whole internet pretty much summed up my general view of what happened this week. Microsoft shot themselves in the foot, and Sony laughed their asses off. While doing so, they did the simple trick of giving the people what they want: now they have us under their spell until they rip the rug from under our feet. It'll happen, it's business, I assure you. Meanwhile Nintendo did their own thing - as usual - and presented themselves well.

Since Sony and Nintendo tend to get my money in some way, shape, or form, I'll get a Wii U and/or a PS4 once the libraries have expanded. It'll probably be when I'm done college and have a stable income.

The All-In-One Device... Minus Gaming

Maybe I was born in the wrong generation. Why else do I apologize to adults about the intolerable mess of our pop music? Why else do I still cringe at the mentioning of a smart phone? Why else did it take me nearly six years to finally buy a new gaming console?

...Oh wait. I'm a skeptic at heart. And stunts like this make the self-fulfilled prophesy continue to spin in circles.

So... the Xbox One...

Mini Shots: 'Mass Effect'

After spending all of July glued to the coach and oblivious to my blog's existence, I have returned and am as (in)sane as usual. By now I think I have nearly maxed out my fun with my presents so I can move on to college life and not cry myself to sleep. I simply enjoyed not having a life while it lasted.

But now I present some kind of material for the first time in a billion years!

It seems like it was only yesterday when gamers went insane for Mass Effect 3, only for all hopes and dreams to be crushed by the almighty power of EA. How could I have avoided any comments about this series? March was swamped by the fury of raging, homicidal fans crying "BETRAYAL!!!" This circus was too entertaining to avoid!


Alas, I'm a suicidal masochist.

After so many warnings, clearly I am an idiot.

*sigh* Here I am starting yet another collection of pointless merchandise for the sake of indulging my selfish desires. All I'm missing are T-shirts with quotes or running gags. The world warned me that I was putting myself in the same position as every other fan who got punk'd. Suddenly, money vanished from my pockets and all this crap landed on my doorstep.

All joking aside, there are a few things I want to address since anyone who sees the words "mass effect" will probe me with the same old questions. There is a crapload of stuff I could say about the franchise, so I have to severely restrict myself. This is NOT a review; that may not happen until everything sinks in for several months.

Mass Effect 1

This? A space opera? I have dismissed that claim!

Because Microsoft has always made devices that want to plant seeds of hatred in my disposition, I have never played the first game. However, I have been planning to set up my laptop so it can run like a PC so I might have a chance of playing it. It will take a while for me to get this set up, but I do plan to play it somewhere down the line.

Long before I bought ME2, I watched various people play this so I can better understand the plot, characters, politics, terminology, and all that other detailed stuff. Sadly, I have come to the conclusion that most Youtubers who uploaded their sessions have no damn clue how to edit out the dumbest mistakes they make. All these awkward let's plays and walkthroughs were long and torturous. Somehow I made it through... and vowed that I will play it so only I can see my first-time-player stupidity.

Obviously, I enjoyed it enough that I made it to this point, so the pain was worth it. It's only a shame the sequels released on the PS3 force me to miss out on some of the overly-long gags from the first game's side missions.

Mass Effect 2

I love these misfits... well, all but three.

The game that picked up so many perfect scores that Fangirl should be furious at such insanity! Well, yes, it is outrageous that Mass Effect 2 received as much ass-kissing as it got. To be honest, it has some technical issues that rub me the wrong way. (i.e. Sonic 06 has shorter and far less annoying loading times. Let that sink in for a moment.) It didn't change the fact that the game is ridiculously fun. It may be like a "filler episode", but I came to like nearly all of the 12 squadmates I recruited. Since this game gave me the time to get to really know the characters, this narrative was extremely satisfying in the long term.

Getting used to the controls, however, was not fun. Fangirl has now caught up with the times and has learned how to play a shooter. Yay. =_=

Mass Effect 3

The giant space cthulhus have arrived!!

Better controls, better conversations, better graphics, better load times, and a great experience... until the last twenty minutes of the game.

This is far more polished than its brother, while getting back on the same track in terms of tone and narrative as the first game. Everything was so well done that I cried just as hard as when I watched Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2. I was a sobbing baby for 34 hours and I regret none of it. After all of this, I can happily say that the Mass Effect trilogy finally got me to appreciate role-playing games. The only problem is to find another RPG to care about... with an ending that doesn't cause an internet wildfire.

The Ending(s) [or lack thereof... kind of]

No, you little punk. It was your fault Marauder Shields died!

This may get complicated....
**Spoiler Warning**

Heads up, everyone. Everything about the endings has some trace of BULLSHIT in it.

That one Destroy ending in which Commander Shepard takes half a breath before the screen turns black? Bullshit. Either commit to the character being dead or returning to the Normandy and high-fiving every one of those loyal misfits who stood by Shepard through hell and back. And just because it's the one ending where Shepard lives, that does not automatically mean it's the best ending.

None of the endings reflect upon the ideas discussed throughout the course of the trilogy? Bullshit. Destroy the Reapers? That was the reason why Shepard had to unite the galaxy. Control the Reapers? Cerberus and the Illusive Man obsessed about it. Synthesis of organic and synthetic life? Didn't Saren mention something about that in the first game? I would not argue that the ideas are ass pulls, but that the writing team poorly explained these ideas to create a cohesive and acceptable conclusion. (i.e. What is this "new genetic makeup" of all life in the Synthesis ending? Why do all artificial and virtual intelligences die with the Reapers in Destroy?)

Forcing a condition on someone against his or her will is what makes Synthesis and Control the worst choices. Uh, what? No matter which option you pick you either A) exterminate an entire race of beings, regardless of their morality, and/or B) force an entire new way of life on the galaxy. No matter the option, you are playing god, forcing your will upon every living thing in the galaxy. Free will is completely ignored. This argument is absurd.

The creators cannot coexist peacefully with the created? Well, if you, like some players, busted your butt to end the quarian-geth subplot without one group or the other facing extinction head-first... uh, bullshit. Even with the Extended Cut, it would have been so nice if Shepard would point out that he/she did manage to resolve that conflict. Instead, the game treats it as if that whole incident never happened. Nice.

The Indoctrination Theory is the only reasonable explanation for the plotholes. Bullshit. After all the horrible crap he/she goes through, I have no problem believing that Shepard may have had hallucinations. But when people take this "it was all a dream" theory as the best possible explanation for everything that happened in the ending, this spells laziness. I would rather take the contrived, forced writing behind the Catalyst's epic logic fail than to say, "The Reapers were screwing with you in this messed up dream!"

Before I get a ton of hate messages, I'll stop. As for the Refusal... you were given the chance to beat the Reapers and you blew it. Enough said.

On the bright side though, the Extended Cut brings the emotional closure that many fans have been crying over the most. I installed it right before I started playing Mass Effect 3 and I am a happy camper. Despite the endings being confusing and frustrating if you think too much, I can happily say this did not desecrate my overall love of this series. Maybe it's because I already knew how the endings went so  the punch to the gut was nowhere as intense as I originally feared.

Extras

Critical research fail.

I have been reading Revelation, Ascension, and Retribution. Since the author was one of the major writers for the first two games, I figured I would enjoy the supplementary material. And I am very muchly. So much so that I shall avoid Deception because that new author fails at RESEARCH.

Comics are not really my cup of tea, so I have not checked out the other spin-off stuff.

I look forward to the Paragon Lost anime coming out later this year. As for the live-action film that's in the early stages... this better not suck. The fanbase is pretty rabid, and video game adaptations tend to be badly received. This better not be a disaster or else the Mass Effect fans will be no better than the Silent Hill fans in my eyes. There are enough nitpicky purists out there. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It will be a long time until I review any of these. Who knows? Maybe Mass Effect will be a flash-in-the-pan obsession of mine and I won't give a crap in three months.

At the very least I'll say one last thing. Mass Effect 2 is better than 3 in terms of story, and 3 is better than 2 in terms of gameplay.

....

Oh... and FemShep for the win. ^_^

'Prometheus'

First impression: looks like the live-action cousin of Ergo Proxy.
After seeing the film, my reaction has only confirmed my guess.

Here it is. The supposed "prequel" to the series that traumatized me for years. Thanks to the Alien movies, I never liked the sight or thought of something foreign within one's abdomen. Of course, my dad, being more intelligent than Stephen Hawking, showed me the films when I was SIX, so it's not much of a surprise.

Even way before the film was announced, I had no desire to see this film. Not because of my mental scars, but because everyone hyped the crap out of it. As a result of squealing like children on Christmas Eve, everyone has their underwear tied into knots over how good or bad the film is. The reviews, ranging from "OMFG, it's glorious!" to "WTFH is this pile?", provided endless entertainment from me. After I read the whole plot summary, it got to the point that I already had an opinion of the film without watching it. Yet my dear old man took me to see it so I had a frame of reference when I rant about my opinion here. It's long overdue anyway.

So what did I think?

Objectively, it's not the worst of the year; the film is a visual feast to behold. But there are plenty of places where the film trips over its feet or stumbles down the stairs. Overall, if you take all the good and the horrible, it adds up to be... a bit below average. Subjectively, this movie annoys me more than the target of one of my last reviews. This film... and some of the people who defend it... piss me off to no end. This film drops so much bait for the pseudo-philosophers to binge on and claim the film makes so many deep references to Jesus Christ and Christianity. Believe me, some have written essays on what this film is about.

What is the ship called? Prometheus. What day do the crew members wake up from suspended animation? Christmas Day. When did the Engineers die on their ship? Two thousand years ago.What is the name of the sterile woman who just so happens to become pregnant? Elizabeth. What is that around her neck? A cross. What is her reason to claim that the Engineers created us? "Because that's what I choose to believe." What is that? Faith, which is simply belief without proof. What day is it when the film ends? January 1, in "the year of Our Lord" 2094.

Is this the only point to the film? Does this film have to jam the idea down our throats that this is something we must think about? Must we accept that a scientist with a strong faith in her Lord and Savior is someone we can stand behind as a protagonist? Must we accept that this film refuses to have their scientists - except the geologist - question the legitimacy of a "belief" held by said religious woman, supported by her jerk-ass boyfriend scientist? Should we take this seriously as a film that makes you think of mythological gods that killed themselves - I meant, "sacrificed themselves" - for the sake of the human race to have life?

Hell no.

I expected this film to tell a story, not a lecture. I expected a decent premise, plot progression, character development, and a resolution. The only thing this movie got right was the characterization of David, the android. HE had a legitimate internal conflict and throughout the course of the story he asked questions, interacted with the cast, and served a valuable purpose on the trip, while learning more about life. He was very aware that he was a created intelligence, had great dialogue with Dr. Shaw, and was the most active character in discovering the Engineers. It's interesting that the one created by humans is the one who did his creators' homework in finding their creator.

Oh yes, all the humans - ALL of them - were horrifically stupid. Even if the pretentious themes and intents behind the film were appropriate and well done, the characters were absolutely insulting. They were the black permanent marker stains on an elegant, finely detailed French dress. No one was likable. Everyone fit their generic roles in a horror flick. Dr. Holloway and the captain were the jackasses. The biologist was the blond, being the first to die in the stupidest way possible. Weyland was the selfish old guy. Dr. Shaw was the idiot. Everyone else had no name and was forgettable.

As for the plot... it's generic and bland. Weak premise for a sci-fi film supported by little and poor reasoning. Seriously, how could you conclude that a bunch of aliens are saying "Come to our world, kids! We have candy!" from murals around the world with a set of five dots in a pattern? Which of those five "dots" did they go to and how did they know?

Nitpicking aside, the plot was written very awkwardly. The dialogue wasn't bad, but there were many instances were I wondered if plot details ware missing or if whole scenes had to be rewritten. I'm not the greatest writer on the planet, look at my posts here and point out all the grammatical and structural errors, but I asked myself many times if I would edit the writers' notes to death? This movie feels like there are several minor scenes cut out just so it could be a reasonable two hour presentation.

Wait... do you know what this whole thing is? FAN SERVICE. Not the kind with half-naked women posing around or excessive blood and gore to get the hormones raging. This is fan service to the Alien fans by saying, "Hey! This is how the xenomorphs came to be! Ain't that cool?" This is a film with nothing but two hours of half-assed, horror-movie padding and unexplored controversial debates that have never been resolved ever since logic and faith clashed. All of this happens, and in the end they only show us a minute and a half of a xenomorph popping out of the abdomen of an albino Kratos from God of War. Then the writers have the balls to leave the initial questions in the premise UNANSWERED and drops a few bread crumbs to a potential sequel.

Oh, I forgot about the monsters and the horror aspect of the movie. It did fine. No complaints. I'm jaded by scary films by this point, and Prometheus was nothing special but not bad in that regard. No, the ending did not disgust me.

At the end of the day, it's nice that people can think deeply about this, but that does not make this film excellent. All the pretty visuals and the convoluted explanations cannot undo a film that fails to live up to the standards of basic storytelling. Ridley Scott and his crew worked their asses off to make as many allusions as possible that they forgot that this is a science fiction film with SCIENTISTS who cannot do their jobs even if their lives depended on it. These guys are supposed to be telling a story, not showing off your intelligence. It may say a lot to some when I say that Damon Lindelof was one of the guys behind the TV show Lost, but a sloppy story ending with sequel bait is inexcusable.

The last words in the film speak for themselves. The surviving members of the plot go off to find the Engineers and demand to know why humanity was created. Wasn't this question posed at the beginning of the film? If so, then that means that we have an UNANSWERED QUESTION. To everyone who said that this film has all mysteries resolved or is open-ended and up for interpretation... BULLSHIT. This is a research paper turned in on its due date with no concluding paragraphs. Your teacher/professor would slap you if you demanded that your work deserves an A because it's so many pages long or you tackled a hard topic. Your professor is not going to guess what your conclusion is. Your work is incomplete. You FAILED.

And it's comments like these that annoy me the most.

Person A: "Kind of wondering if [the Amazing Atheist's] entire review is a joke. Distracting us with a bunch of interesting subjects in depth, but ignoring the basics of the movie. Which is essentially what the film was: a lot of potential for depth and powerful themes, but it just amounted to a lukewarm film."

Person B: "No, they just saw it for what it was meant to be, unlike you."

"...many of you criticize the so called plot-holes and "unanswered questions". What baffles me is that no one and I mean no one here wants to think. Don't understand what I mean, do you? Take for example the Force from Star Wars. Why is it so awesome? Because we hardly know anything about it. Where did it come from? How did we find it? How exactly does it work? [...] These are all "unanswered questions" and they make you think and imagine, speculate and investigate. These kind of questions make the movie interesting and intriguing. The same is easily applied to Prometheus, - it gives us a fair amount of answers and clues and keeps us speculating at the same time. And for me - this the real magic of cinema. Prometheus is a solid and thought provoking movie and in general just a wondrous experience. I guess people nowadays are used to the facts that movies just give away all the answers and plot elements on a silver platter (take Avatar for example, - the moral is there but it's so straight and obsessive that it leaves no room for real thought. Awful movie by the way) and that's a real shame. As for my advice go and watch Prometheus with an open mind and be ready to think."

"I feel like I watched an entirely different movie from what you just described. Most of the things you say were holes or issues are clearly explained by the movie if you pay attention or simply put two and two together.  I enjoyed this movie for its meticulous sense of details, how some things don't click in your mind until after seeing it.  I honestly don't understand half your complaints because lots of them seem like you could have only come to that conclusion if you were either really tired or simply not paying attention to some things which either were explained by dialogue or obvious. (and yes somethings straight up aren't explained- Scott did say this was going to be a trilogy)."

"It's an excellent film as long as you do not expect it to a) be science fiction or b) make any sense on the surface level, rather than the symbolic level..."


It's good as long as you pretend it's not a science fiction film?! Don't deny what this film is supposed to be!

Gag me with a spork. I may have been closed-minded about this film, but I sure as hell used my damn brain to nitpick every inch of this pretentiously-wrapped and superficial film. You can accuse me of overheating my brain, but not for one moment did I stop thinking about this colossal disappointment.

1 out of 5

Watch it if you will, but I cannot give this a thumbs up. Do not trust your beloved reviewers because this film is too polarizing. Even Doug, Linkara, Film Brain, Spoony, and Brad Jones from That Guy With the Glasses, a site with some very similar-minded people, had their own separate opinions on it all across the spectrum.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some Mass Effect 2 to play on my new PS3...

Why Are You Guys Reading These?!

Despite my lack of posts so far this year, I still keep a decent eye on what you guys read and how often. Everyone who provides some sort of entertainment has to do it every once in a while in order to see what people like. What I have found makes me chuckle, not because some of my posts were destined to get attention, but because I have no clue how some obtained so many views.

On one hand I am happy to see that more and more people all around the world are finding and reading my blog. I have no impressive following by any stretch of the imagination, but I love that my blog is not as deserted as it was when I began. Even with my lack of activity people still read my posts! Even if only one to three people ever comment, I still like that some people care.

With that nauseating optimism out of the way, let me respond to the feedback I received via some of my most viewed posts on my blog! By doing this, these popular guys will get even MORE views... I guess I should pop their egos a bit... What really makes me laugh is the huge rift between the top three with everything else. It's so weird.


1. 'The Open Door' with 2,290 views

People love my bitching about Evanescence.

I'm not completely surprised that this would get a lot of hits, given how popular and mainstream the act is at least by name. But like with nearly everything I put up here, this was something I had to get off my chest. Evanescence used to be my favorite band of all time. I still respect them because they were my gateway into the general genre of rock music.

I have outgrown them and matured... but I still have some beef with how outrageously popular they are. I have always struggled with accepting that some things are popular than others because of accessibility or money. In this case, Evanescence is just easier on the ears for casual music listeners in comparison to more enthusiastic music fans - especially of alternative rock and gothic metal.

Hopefully time will ease my rage. Or Evanescence can make better music.


2. Eat Me, Drink Me with 1,190 views

Wow, my old reviews really sucked. Not that I'm so much better NOW, but still... rereading it was not fun.

Anywho.

To this day, I still don't care for Eat Me, Drink Me as a whole but I think it has to do more with Marilyn Manson himself. I have listened to Mechanical Animals, Holy Wood, and The Golden Age of Grotesque and even those albums don't impress me much. Don't get me wrong, they have far more interesting songs, but the albums don't satisfy me enough. It seems that the man himself is far more interesting and entertaining than the music he makes. That's really a shame.

I still plan to get his new album later this year, but I doubt I'll really, really like it. Maybe there will be two or four songs that I will really love.


3. Vampire Knight with 930 views

One of my less painful old reviews, I guess.

The last time I checked up on the series, Vampire Knight was even more convoluted and terrible. If I were to review the series as a whole again, I would more than likely give it a 1 out of 5. It's sad that it was the first anime and manga series I found about vampires. Now I have Hellsing Ultimate and it's freaking a masterpiece in comparison.

But on the bright side, Vampire Knight is superior to Twilight. Zero has a better reason to be an angsty jerk than Edward or Jacob at their most melodramatic.

4. And More Impatient Fans Leave... with 400 views

Another Evanescence rant.

This was stuck in my chest for years and I'm glad I got it out. I did check Wikipedia some time before their latest album was released and I blushed in embarrassment. They went on hiatus because Amy had to set back and redefine Evanescence after the huge successes of The Open Door and Fallen. Having to step back, rest, and examine your out-of-nowhere success because you feel like you're running into an identity crisis is somewhat reasonable.

But I think my biggest issue - and many fans may agree with me - is the fact that there was a serious lack of communication from everyone. Other than firing the drummer and guitarist, no one knew what the hell was going on for several years. Even Ville Valo of HIM - who are as of this post on a "break" to find a new record deal - came out in a Kerrang! article around Valentine's Day telling everyone that he and the boys are still alive!

It just... frustrates me.

5. Shadow the Hedgehog with 390 views

Hahahaha... I'm in the process of writing a follow-up to this very brief and generalized review. I still love this game a lot, but man it has it's issues. Whether it's a good or bad game is pretty much up to anyone who can tolerate some of the stuff in this controversial mixed bag. The response to this game was one of the biggest reasons why the Sonic fanbase, especially the more psychotic fanboys, fangirls, and furries (not all of them but the worst cases), scares the living crap out of me.

To put it briefly, I can tolerate the guns, the missions, the music, and the slightly less annoying voice acting from the 4Kids crew. But I can't defend the writing, dialogue, some plot points, and "Almost Dead." Damn, Powerman 5000 might not be a horrible band - I hope - but I hate that song.

I may do the very rare, small wishes to review a video game in the future... just if I actually plan my points a lot better. It's not as easy as taking on an album or movie...

6. Higurashi: When They Cry with 230 views

This has been getting more views recently and I can't complain. It's a series I wish was more known.

I finished the series months ago and I really need to review the second season. Now that I look back on it, Higurashi is probably one of the best horror stories I have ever experienced. After this, all horror is bland and boring. Thank you, Higurashi for making me feel jaded.

The story is far from perfect and it does not have much value in re-watching it, but I sure had a blast while the mystery was building up. Some scenes still bug me though...


7. Death Note with 220 views

I'm surprised I didn't get trolled for typing such blasphemy.

No, I never finished this series. Maybe when I'm extremely bored, I might consider it, but it's just... urgh...

But I won't go back on my point that this is a decent start for anyone who wants to get into anime. This is one of the most striking in terms of production and presentation. I may think that most of the stuff Studio Madhouse made are overrated, the company still makes great quality work. And of course the voice acting is fantastic in both English and Japanese.

I'm not surprised this got a lot of views due to it's popularity. Though my opinion on it is rather negative, I won't discourage anyone who wants to check it out. By all means, watch it! It's just not my cup of tea.


Keep enjoying what you read... even if I never completely understand why you like it...

Why Avoid 4Kids' English Dub of Sonic X?

Because you will want to kill yourself.

I would have loved to have gone into tons of detail on this, but I would have never completed my review of the show. The extreme cases can best be noticed visually. However, there are several that go deeper than that. So from the hilarious and obvious, the confusing and silly, and the insulting, I present a fraction of what you will endure in the English version of Sonic X. I wish I could have found so much more in a more organized fashion, but 4Kids has a tendency to delete anything "copyrighted."

Exhibit A: Imagery

1:04 - Good kids won't study or try this at home.

1:11 - You mean I'm not a good kid?

1:37 - G.U.N. stands for "Guardian Union of Nations" *facepalm* RESEARCH!!

1:47 - Egg Emperor Eggman Robo E-99

Exhibit B: Death

Admittedly, this might show my bias towards Shadow, but this is one of the biggest contrasts between the Japanese and English versions. Maria was essential to the whole plot of Sonic Adventure 2. Her death is the reason the whole story even unfolded and why Shadow is deemed an "emo" by the general public! Thanks, 4Kids!

In my defense, however, this is a universal problem in all of the other shows. One Piece took the brunt of it head-on. But I digress...

Yes! Maria never died! She was NEVER shot and killed! The whole revenge plot was just a silly, whiny, overdramatic bitch fest over being "taken away" by the boogeyman! Remember: death does not exist, kids!

The English version starts at about 5:00 just in case not understanding Japanese just hurts. Basically though, Molly is killed and Shadow avenges her. After they built her grave, Rouge asks Shadow if he reacted so strongly because Molly reminded him of Maria. He, however, denies this.

"She's off on another adventure." That's a load of crap. "Well, yeah I liked her. She's a good kid." Since when did Jason Griffith portray his half-jackass and half-crybaby Shadow as being open and honest?! And after that stupid edit?! CONSISTENCY!!!!! *rapidly beats head against laptop*

Exhibit C: Voice Acting and Dialogue

If the earlier clips didn't make your ears bleed, then you are made of steel. Otherwise, enjoy more!

At least this was reasonable...

The corny jokes... the emotion (or lack there of)... *groans*
And yes. This is one of the least annoying ones...

must... resist... urge... to... harm... Jason Griffith... *brain explodes*

Exhibit D: Deleted Scenes

4Kids must nitpick over every silly joke.

OH NO! IT'S X-RATED! DELETE, DELETE!!!!!

=_='

If they had such a problem with a bit of a girl's daydream, I'd love to see 4Kids take a stab at an anime romantic comedy...

Vector trying [and failing] in his plans to get two characters together. Don't we all do that to our friends with their silly crushes? So why get rid of it in this show? Are you allergic to romance or something?!

And the Finale:

The sub-dub comparison starts at about 7:30.

Sonic X was not as butchered as other anime 4Kids picked up, but every single one suffered from some form of stupid edits and censors that can annoy. You might argue that these shows are meant for kids; HOWEVER, that is not true for their original Japanese versions. It's one thing to make some changes for cultural reasons. Japan is known to let sexual tension, blood, and violence slide (heck, Rouge made an S&M joke at one point.) But to completely deconstruct beyond recognition is too much. To change names, alter plot details, emphasize words awkwardly, add different music, and remove emotion in dramatic moments...

I think you get the idea.

Here are other examples of mentioned edits from various shows 4Kids picked up.

2:09-2:22 - they are ONIGIRI!! Rice balls wrapped in nori seaweed and dried, salty umeboshi plums!! NOT JELLY DONUTS!

2:25-4:07 - "We're friends... I guess I'll shoot... but I'll be sad...ish" :'(

4:08-6:33 - "I CAN'T KILL YOU! I LOVE YOU!!" TT-TT

6:43 - Jason Griffith... singing? ZOMFG, NO!! MOMMY, MAKE IT STOP!! TT.TT *shoots self*

7:40 - Dan Green!! No! Save yourself from this humiliation!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Looks like I should stop beating the ashes of the corpse of a dead horse. If you were able to put up with me this whole time, I will love you forever. ^_^

'Anonymous'

Strikingly awesome poster. 'Nuff said.
(CREDIT: found on Wikipedia)

Shakespeare, a fraud? Try saying that to your English teacher. I know I did... playfully.

The greatest playwrite of the English language. Any pieces of fiction writen in books, sung in poetry, and performed on stage or film is subject to copywrite thanks to a dead man. The Einstein, the god, of literature. And it has been a solid fact for hundreds of years. Denial and skepticism will send you to the guillitine, electric chair, or the gallows.

But honestly, this whole debate about the authorship of Shakespeare is long and heavily researched to the point that an average human brain will hemorrhage. You might catch me spending more time in a library than the science lab, but even I don't have the attention span to tackle a controversy on life support thanks to stubborn scholars. I'll stick to extensive research on vampire mythology, thank you very much. Both might be overrated topics, but I have more patience with the latter.

Anonymous is a movie you should not take as historically acurate or factual. (For that matter, doubt that anything "based on a true story" is completely authentic.) And unless you are a Shakespearian scholar or history nut, don't overanalyze every single thing this film does wrong. Again, your brain will explode and I won't be there to clean you up.

To simplify things this film states that Edward de Vere, 17th Earl of Oxford was the real "Shakespeare" who gave his written works to Ben Johnson, who was to take the credit. But the real actor Shakespeare decided to take it for himself. ...It's complicated.

Standing on its own as a film, Anonymous is very entertaining. The look and atmosphere of London is absolutely beautiful - though the darker imagery made it felt more Victorian than Elizabethan, especially when it feels dark and cold all the time. (Even though I went to England over the summer, I had no clue the country was always like winter!) However, the cast is very good and solid with great performances. Shakespeare was an annoying drunken idiot, but he grows on you albiet very slowly. Everyone else... great. There is a lot of personality in the cast, but it gets so hard to remember names past the "big players."

The story, however, is a mess. The main cast is easy to recognize, but everyone's roles blur together and create an entangled confusion. Once Anonymous dives into the political drama - or "facts" - it gets really hard to stay on top on the banter. Some information was either extraneous or poorly conveyed to the casual viewer. Furthermore, most of the characters contradict their historical counterparts.

Worst of all the sequence of events were severely disconnected as the jump cuts jerk you back and forth between various periods of time. At first, the film was nice enough to give you the years but later you will be left asking "when in the heck are we?" The flow of time simply makes no sense.

If you can easily sit through an entertaining movie, you might enjoy this. Everyone else might bust their brains into the wall. As for me, I might or might not watch it again to pick up on the bullshit. It looks nice, but the storytelling is pretty darn confusing. At the end of the day, this conspiracy theory did not make me believe everything really happened. But then again I'm mature enough...

Maybe I'm too moderate for this type of thing...

FINAL VERDICT:

2 out of 5