For Those Who Gave Up

Some debateble things are best not to be touched. For example, politics and religion reign supreme in the list of topics not to disscuss with anyone you please. Today's social atmosphere in America clearly proves this true. You can say tea, muslim, or health and you are bound to have someone, on the left or right, scream curses at you. While that happens, hundreds or thousands die of starvation while millions more continue to suffer. Three cheers for political cat fights!

Because I do not feel educated enough in this field, I will not rant on politics. The confusing ads about balancing the budget and new jobs make my ears and eyes bleed. However, part of this will involve religion... because my wish to talk about this stemmed from my *ahem* CATHOLIC Morality class. Nothing against Catholics, but my school makes it sound like no other type of morality exists or can be similar in any way. (Or no other morality exists.)

To start off class each day, we pray and state what intentions we want to share. One girl said she was worried about her friend, who hasn't been improving from his medical condition. But what caught my attention was what another girl said. Someone she knew commited suicide because he was made fun of so much and couldn't take it anymore. My teacher, hands resting on the back of his head, reclined back in his chair and struggled to find the right words to say. And what did the holier-than-thou, good ol' Catholic respond? "That's ridiculous."

Maybe those weren't his exact words, but he didn't have a single ounce of pity or sympathy in his voice. And my friends keep telling me he's a nice guy.

Obviously you can't always judge a man by his beliefs, but at this point, I might have a decent idea of how he is like. He's not a horrible person, but I can't get past his "good ol' Catholicism" preaching. This is a morality class for juniors, not seventh grade religion. But what bothers me is that he reminds me too much of a religion teacher I had back in fifth and sixth grade. She would force us to pray the rosary every day; to fill out activity sheets for two year olds; and to read the Bible every Friday. My class even watched when Pope Benedict XVI replaced Pope John Paul II. As a ten/eleven year old, that was torture to me. Now my current teacher isn't that bad, but I can still sense a similar approach to faith that she used.

But back on topic. What upset me was from his few, cold words, I almost felt a deep, subconscious hole in me, as if someone angry was repetedly punching me at full force.

In terms of the whole "is suicide justifiable" debate, I don't care if you think that poor person would go to heaven or hell. Would it be wrong to show some pity for him or her? Would you at least share a consoling word to the family of the suicide victim? Would you at least say, "What a tragedy. I am so sorry." with some emotion? From what I heard today, my teacher would say no.

To be blunt, I don't know if God/a god(dess), multiple gods/godesses, the devil, heaven, hell, or an afterlife exists. I don't have a desire to follow a certain creed if someone forces it down my throat. But I do mourn the death of anyone (though I probably wouldn't for a psycho like Hitler...) Though I never realy liked his music much, I was shocked by Michael Jackson's death. I was upset when Ronnie James Dio passed away this year. But maybe I feel the most sorry for suicide victims.

I used to be a very happy kid until I went to grade school. In second grade, I walked in smiling; at the end of third grade, I came out depressed. Making friends never came easy for me again. My peers either hated me or treated me as if I never existed. To this day, I still haven't recovered and I still don't know why I was always disliked. For the longest time, I only had one friend, who ultimately manipulated me emotionally near the end of our friendship. Boys never even tried to communicate with me, and from that, people assumed I was a lesbian. Because I still haven't (and might never) recovered from this, I robotically go through school until I can get the hell out. Some people NOW decide to acknowledge me a little bit. Though I am nice to some, I subconsciously let karma bite everyone else. It's not a polite or morally right thing to do, but I've had enough of it.

However, at the end of the day, I am still alive. My parents took me to therapy for the three of us for most of my fifth grade year. Three years later, things got easier and I finally found two really good friends. My peers weren't as bad as I once thought they were. Today, I have three good friends, who tell me to fix my hair and eyebrows and who put up with my rants. Now I feel more like a typical kid with basic issues. It took me ten years to get where I am now.

Those who took their own lives might not gone through a similar situation as me, but I do have some sympathy. There were times I wondered what would happen if I died one day. But I always knew my parents would be upset. My good friends would too. But what about my peers? Would some actually care? Would some bullshit and say I was their bestest buddy ever? Would they say I'd burn in hell? Or would they not care and ask "is someone missing? Hmm, maybe not?"

In my view, suicide is not something you can coldly tag as being a good or bad thing. Suicide is pathetic, and can be cowardly. But there is no reason to be rude about it. There is no reason to brush it off as something ridiculous. Suicide is not a "no-no" in a religious holy book. Suicide is a death of a suffering human being. Could he/she have been helped? Yes. Could have someone saved of stoped him/her? Yes. Is every case of suicide easy to judge? NO. Just like in My Sister's Keeper with the cancer girl and her sister, some cases of suicide can't be deemed as downright wrong.

To those who want to give up on life, hang on. Death is inevitable, and it's something we all have to come to terms with. But life is important too. Live as if it's your last day. Don't get lost in dreams of the past or the future. Live for today. To those who gave up, I pity you. For whatever reasons you had for leaving, I will not judge. I wish for comfort for you family and friends.

If you don't agree with anything I said, that's fine. But all I ask is to not be like my religion teacher. Even if you think suicide is pathetic, have a heart, or at least pretend you have one. This is especially true if you are around the person who was close to the suicide victim.

Depressing, eh? Well, again. Live the best life you can, whether you are Catholic, Muslim, an atheist, on the left or right political spectrum, or one on the west or east hemisphere. And when it comes to our end, que será será... whatever will be, will be. :)

"Na Na Na (Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na)"

(CREDIT: owned by creator and My Chemical Romance. Found on http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Na_Na_Na_(Na_Na_Na_Na_Na_Na_Na_Na_Na))

My Rank: 3.5/5 <- exciting...

Unlike Three Days Grace, My Chemical Romance didn't make me suffer while waiting for their new album. MCR didn't give THREE changes to the release date of their album and then say after two years of joking around that "oh, NOW we're recording." So I applaud MCR for not giving me constant heart attacks like 3DG did. Plus, "Na Na Na (Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na)" impresses me more than "Break" did. But typing it out is dreadful...

Once a band has released at least three record, you can have a good idea what their style is, and My Chemical Romance is pretty over-the top. Going overboard tends to annoy me very much, hence why I can't stomach Lady GaGa at all. But the the difference between her and a band like this is that MCR has a theme to go by. They have a story to go by. Like with The Black Parade, it was a story about a dying cancer patient, and the album flowed as if it could easily be a musical, or a theatrical play. But it didn't stop there. Gerard Way dyed his hair white and had it cut so it looked like he had cancer. For the music video "Welcome to the Black Parade," the patient died and watched a crazy, but impressive "black parade" playing and coming for him. The imagery was impressive, the music was emotional and passionate. Was it all overboard? Maybe. But everything fit. Everything came together as a complete, vivid puzzle that was... perfect. I honestly don't know what words could convey how impressed I was with the art from that era. Maybe it helped that I do like theatrics.

Not that Lady GaGa can't do that, but she's so scrambled up and inconsistent with her outrageous ten minute music videos. But while she does that, I can stay tuned to MCR's theatrics and 30 Seconds to Mars's long videos that have some actual plot. So I can live in peace without GaGa. :)

"Na Na Na" sounds like classic MCR, but isn't as messy as any song off Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge. But sure is one hell of a ride of cursing, theatrics, insane outfits and hairstyles, and a curious new chapter in the band's universe. The music video was pretty fun overall (and the guys from Mindless Self indulgence were appeared guests.) What a blast. I can't wait to learn more about Battery City, Better Living Industries, and the lives of the Fabulous Killjoys. If all goes well, Danger Days will be the third excellent album worth buying this year. If there was one good thing listening to the majority did for me, it was trying out My Chemical Romance. Love 'em or hate 'em, they are pretty crazy and fun.

Why I didn't give this song such a high rating? It's great, but this isn't the best MCR song. But it'll do until Danger Days will be released. November 22 will be an awesome day. XD

MCR Transmissions

Because I'm such a strange person who likes My Chemical Romance.

This will keep me entertained for a short while until Nov 22. XD

October Update

I haven't had much to say in the past several days, but it seems everyone has been crazy lately. Even some people I follow on Youtube have apologized to their viewers for not updating. That's the nature of autumn I guess.

But really, I have been stressed out over the studio art course I'm taking. So far, I have three assignments to take care of, and one is due on Monday. I also have to take photos of autumn for the next two weeks... I wish I could head over to nearby parks and fields, but no permit equals no driving.

Anyway, it seems I'll update at least once a month and post an entry once a week. Maybe it'll be a rant, maybe a review (two are in mind right now), I don't know. But I am not yet dead. :)

Halloween is right nearby and I'm pretty excited. I'll be with my best friend and her boyfriend as we watch movies. Although we are dying to see something scary, by friend is too much of a scaredy-cat. The Nightmare Before Christmas is great, but Halloween ain't Halloween without something scary.

If I don't update before it... HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!!!!! >:)

And You Thought This Fangirl Lost Some Bananas

Just because I haven't made a full rant in a while, I finally found something just a few minutes ago and I have to let it out.

Because I haven't frequently visited Valo Daily like back in the summer, I decided to check out how everything was going. Granted, I'm new there, so my impression is not even a fingerprint on a crystal clean window, but whatever. While viewing the recent comments, someone posted up something that many (including myself) found incredibly disturbing. Here's part of the message here:

"...according to what people post on some international HIM boards it seems that though it's no Helldone this year some of the fans are still going to travel to Helsinki! ... it's cool that people still want to see the New Year in in the Promised Land of Love Metal, but...some of these fans are planning to celebrate right in Munkkiniemi, next to Ville's house! It is so sick! WTF? It's crossing the line, poor Ville! Hope he's wise enough not to stay home in the New Year's Eve...When I read stuff like that I have no doubt that the world is slowly going crazy..."

I must give my parents a high five for conceiving and raising a child who would never be insane enough to even WANT to do such a thing.

How can one even begin? Is there a word in any language that can best describe these people who plan such a thing without resorting to a tongue dipped in filth? Is there any word to label these people without putting them to a level below plankton? Because I'm struggling, I'll stick to a simple one and an adjective attached to it. INSOLENT IDOITS. Okay, maybe that wasn't nice, but there are worse things I could have said.

One thing I always learned, and still stick to a bit too much, is R-E-S-P-E-C-T. I think we need Aretha Franklin to teach the lesson for these people! Honestly, after reading that message, I realized that they have no respect for Ville as a basic human being. I bet you that if he actually was a normal guy who never was the loved HIM singer, not one of them would give a crap of his existence. Even if he/she walked past him on the street. Even if he held the door open for him/she. Even if he gave him/her the wallet he/she dropped by accident. In this state of mind that they seem to be in, I think I might be right. And that's sad.

And have they heard of the concept of a "personal bubble" or "personal property?" If those guys never heard of the story when some drunk girl slammed on Ville's house door for hours until he called the police, then they are so far out of touch with reality.

Maybe I'm being mean, but I would honestly never do anything to that extreme. As much as I love him as a musician and smart guy, I'd probably faint just by walking past his house. It might sound weird, but because I'm a nervous person, I am sure I couldn't handle meeting a famous person.... or better yet, a famous person I look up to! Like my dad, I'm too much of a people pleaser. If someone is talking to me, I do my best to not give a bad first impression. At the same time, conversation can be awkward because I try to hard. We all screw up, but being a perfectionist doesn't help one's situation much does it?

It's one thing to find the famous person you like, but no one else notices, and you talk to them when they least expect it. Some famous people just don't get recognized, and maybe some of them do find it nice for an admirer to say hello and have a small chat. Who knows? Maybe you might have made their day from your paths intersecting for a moment. It's another when it's someone EVERY. PERSON. WANTS. TO. MEET. And the last thing you need is to piss them off because too many fans tackled them in less than ten minutes.

So when it comes down to things, as much as I love HIM as a whole, and all five members, I would never want to meet them. Maybe it's the whole "I'm not worthy" complex that I'm showing off, but I respect them enough that I'd admire them from a distance. I don't need to hunt them down and see them in the same room as me. That already happened at my first time seeing them live back in March! Do I need their autographs? Nope. A picture with them? Hell no! I'm not the most photogenic person! Fly to Helsinki and try to be right outside Ville house for New Years? I'd rather sit through twenty four consecutive hours of nonstop politics over the trillions of dollars in debt the US has. At least that would be worth time and money.

Why the hell would one spend so much on a plane ride to a goddamn freezing country in THE MIDDLE OF WINTER to stand outside some man's house and run the risk of getting arrested in a foreign country?! Let me know when you have an answer for that!

Am I being rude and insulting to these people? I probably am, but they seem to have absolutely have no respect for this man. If these fans were joking just as a way to cope with no Helldone this year, they better know it wasn't funny in any way. And if they were serious... I won't take back what I say. That's why everyone gets wound up when I voice my opinions.

Despite that, I feel much better now that I left off some steam. This wasn't professional, but when were rants supposed to be? Besides, I miss this. :P

So hopefully you learned something else about me. Fangirl is insanely crazy about her obsessions; but she isn't so blind as to stalk the people I look up to. So that makes me average, but happy with admiring from afar.

'Let Me In'

(CREDIT: found on http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Let_Me_In_(film))

My Rank: 3.9 out of 5 <- loyal remake, but maybe too identical...

Thank God for Ville Valo. If I never read any interviews of him back in early 2010, I would have never heard of Let the Right One In. Thank God for Youtube. If the many users I often follow didn't say how impressive the story was, I would have never bought the book and watched the Swedish adaptation. And thank God the filmmakers of Let Me In didn't make this too American. In fact, all they did was tweak the location and names, and that's it.

Okay, they did a bit more, but this film greatly reflected it's Swedish sibling. The creepy mood, the awkward conversations, the combustable vampires, and the cold environment remained very well untouched. Not to mention both go slow and feel REALLY long... However, this version is less subtle and there is more blood. A few plot points were changed as well, but like the book and Swedish film no characters were pointless or wasted.

I won't spend from now until eternity arguing which one is better because Låt den rätte komma in and Let Me In are practically identical. In a way it looked like this version copied the Swedish one but changed the language, location, and themes (the boy's mother is religious; an awesome scene with cats in absent; and the focus is so much on the kids.) Because of this, I would say the Swedish version was probably the better one. I don't know, but that version stayed true to the book, while the American version was more inspired by it's sibling.

Sorry if this review isn't a good one, but I can't say much about this film. It's great, but not perfect. Let the Right One In is a great story, I strongly recommend the book over the films. The pacing can be quite painful and slow, but the content, characters, and plot are very impressive for a vampire story. Especially when Twilight plagues the world as it has been for so long.

So: BUY Let the Right One In. THEN watch the Swedish movie. PERIOD.

The first movie I've seen in a while? Wow. And the final Harry Potter movies are near... :'(